Financial education is a buzzword tossed around a lot today. This whole subprime thing wouldn’t have happened if bankers hadn’t been so greedy and prospective mortagors so gullible (or greedy, too, in some cases).
We all need to do a better job of teaching our kids about money management. The best we can hope for is that they learn from our mistakes. Let us not repeat this misadventure — though I imagine that someday we’ll create a new one that will inadvertently run afoul. (Think “Jurrasic Park” meets collateralized debt obligation.)
On this auspicious day, the Fourth Annual Blogging for LGBT Families Day (huzzah! huzzah!), I thought I would write about what it is that LGBT families teach their offspring differently about money than Ward and June Cleaver might have done. As is usually the case with an us-vs.-them comparison, more is similar than is different. It doesn’t matter where you’re from, what you look like, or how you define your “family,” we all want our kids to grow up to be happy, successful, and financially responsible adults. While most things we teach our kids are the same as the Cleaver’s (delayed gratification, how to handle an allowance, how to save up for a big purchase…), my family is a bit different than average.
These are the messages I hope we are teaching my son:
- Sometimes you’ll be the “hunter” and sometimes you’ll be the “gatherer”. At the moment, I’m the one who trudges off to the salt mine in the morning while my partner, Dana,* stays home with our son. But it hasn’t always been this way. When he was born, I was staying home with the Dauphin, while Dana trundled off, travel mug in hand. One of the nice things about non-traditional families is that we can mix it up a bit more. We get to make up the rules as we go along, and we can change them if they no longer suit us
- Both parents should be involved with big financial decisions. While we don’t dwell on money matters over the dinner table, Dana and I do talk about it sometimes. It’s important that our son see us discuss the issues and, if necessary, problem solve.
- Even young people make financial decisions. At this point, I’ll spare him the finer points of refinancing our mortgage, but I was happy to have his input on the “waterpark” vs. “more food” discussion before our recent Disney vacation. Resolution: Waterparks. (But don’t worry, we had plenty of food).
- Work the tax system to your advantage. Pay Uncle Sam what he is due but no more. There can be some tax advantages for an LGBT family. For example we get double the exclusions for capital losses. Follow my blog or Queercents for more tips. (Please excuse my shameless self-promotion).
- Most importantly… Money is a means, not an end. Money can’t buy the important stuff (like love), but life is easier with a roof over your head.
The best way to teach your kids is by example. Try to keep your own finances together, but keep it in perspective. Given the choice between balancing my checkbook and playing with my kid, my kid wins every time. I can always fire up Quicken later, but I can’t seem to stop him from growing up (nor would I want to).
*Full disclosure: I am happily wedded to the Chief Mombian. Oh, that Dana.
Photo credit: Flickr
Science and Money Feed
